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While we all no doubt have our favourite items of clothing for being out on the pull, the founders of PubIdeas.com believe that we have come up with a "must have" garment.
This idea was spawned following the news that a company had brought out a "Panic Bra" which was wired to detect the wearers heart rate and stress levels. If the levels were extreme (presumably because the wearer was being assaulted) then it automatically sent a message for assistance.
In a split-second our honed pub ideas minds sprang into action and within minutes we had fleshed out a prototype for "Pulling Pants".
What they do
Essentially the pants are wired with high-tech gadgetry to enable you and your mates to maximise the fun on an evening out.
The wearer conducts themself in the conventional fashion when out clubbing (gets beered up, leers at members of opposite sex, dances like a frog in a blender), but the "Pulling Pants" really come into play when it looks like there is a potential pull in the offing.
The wearer makes their move as normal (e.g. "Wah-hey love - I bet you don't get many of those to the pound!") and this is where the fun begins. By this stage the wearer will be in such a state that they will forget that they are wearing these technologically advanced pants and be oblivious to what lies in wait for them.
Please read the following sections whilst referring to the diagram below.
Stage one - The Snog
The pants contain a fat bird detector triggered by a pressure pad, and upon detection of a fat bird will automatically phone their mates giving precise details of the wearers location, and estimated weight of said bird.
Stage two - The Shag
Should the wearer go one stage further the tamper detection device will alert their mates to the fact that the wearer has "done the deed", and should face maximum humiliation at the earliest opportunity.
The wearer will then face untold piss-take the following day. What could be more fun?!
As you can see from the detailed artists impression in Figure 1 your pulling opportunities can be enhanced by locating the battery pack in the front pantal area.
| Idea originator(s) | The PubIdeas.com founders |
| Location | "The Stag" Public House, Enfield, Middlesex |
| Units of alcohol consumed | Copious |
| Primary alcohol type(s) | Tetleys, Caffreys, Guinness |
| "Viable Product" rating | Low |